Life is rough when you’re a baby. Sometimes after you finish eating, you turn your head with your eyes still closed and milk dripping off your cheek, and it takes your mom WAY too long to put your binkie in your mouth. The best thing to do in that case is to squawk your disapproval and then open your mouth again. She’ll get it right eventually.
Life is rough when you’re 4. Sometimes your mom tells you that you have to turn off your video games after an hour of playing. The best thing to do in that case is yell “YOU’RE RUDE!” or “IT’S ALL YOUR FAULT!” Or maybe both.
Life is rough when you’re 7 and you have scabs on your elbows and knees from bike wrecks. And then brothers and sisters keep on bumping into your scabs “on purpose!” and your mom fails to punish them as severely as they deserve. The best thing to do in that case is let out a giant roar and throw something at them.
Life is rough when you’re almost 9, and your mom is always trying to take control of your life by insisting that you brush your teeth and do your homework. The best thing to do in that case is to yell at her to let you live your own life!
Life is rough when you’re a pre-teenage girl, and you’re like, the ONLY ONE you know whose mom won’t let them have sleep-overs or a cell phone. The best thing to do in that case is to bring it up as often as you can, adding an occasional eye-roll for emphasis.
BUT… Life is good when you’re the mom. Then all you have to do is boss everyone around and try to think of ways to ruin your children’s lives.